my heart and my mind are both overwhelmed right now. the former with emotions, the latter with thoughts.
it's been the heaviest week for me, sniffer. and i have finally come up with a resolution.
i will let you be. not let you go, but let you be.
any logical person would tell me to stop this madness and move on. but i know i can't yet. and i know that the right time will come when i'll finally decide to move on, if i need to.
but for now, i will let you be. you will have so many excuses right now as to why you can't see me. i will accept that.
but i know this for a fact-you know my worth. i know you do. it's what you're gonna do about it that's scaring you because you're really not ready for anything. in plain truth-you're not that into me. or maybe not just yet. that's why i'll let you be. until you finally have the courage to see me or talk to me again.
because i know one day you will.
until then, i will just be around. i will try to make my life normal again. i will try to be ready to be extraordinary again. because that's what i am-extraordinary. and you know that.
i know i will always have a special place in your heart. you will always have a space in mine too.
but until you finally appreciate my worth, i will let you be.
i won't leave you. i will just be here, most especially if you need me. because we were, first and foremost, friends. and i'd like to think we still are.
and if you're ready to see me or talk to me, i will be here. i won't drive you away.
***
in the movie "dan in real life", it was said that love is not a feeling, but an ability.
i love you, sniffer. i chose to love you. and i know i haven't exhausted all my efforts yet to show you and prove you that.
that's why i'm letting you be.
